I’m really feeling this post and Trans*forming mom definitely does a better job of enumerating the issues we face as residents of southern states, than I do. Though I guess, for me, its less about DOMA specifically and more about how people who live in safer, more liberal states don’t understand that basic health and safety and access to medical care are still really pressing and largely unaddressed concerns for the rest of us. Like, not having a federal ban on gay marriage is great and all, I guess, but it doesn’t mean anything when your state isn’t gonna legalize gay marriage anytime soon, so its kinda hard to see it as a victory.
Its also hard not to be bitter about the fact that the mainstream gay rights movement is more concerned with fighting for the right to get married, than it is with fighting for protection from workplace harrassment and discrimination, or fighting barriers to access to necessary medical care for trans* people. If marriage is your #1 goal for this movement then you need to re-evaluate your priorities. Fighting for the safety of queer people all over this country should take precidence over gay weddings.